There are just 3 more nights left of this topsy turvy messed up beautiful hectic weird AF year. Are you as glad as I am that it’s almost over? It wasn’t all bad, not even close. But the last few weeks of every year make me eager for that exhilarating newness that arrives on Jan 1. It’s as though I can do anything, everything is possible. I know better than to wish away time but I find myself doing it every year.
But 2018 deserves more than a backwards glance as I cast myself into the sea of possibility that is next year. When I saw that Gala Darling did a 2018 in Review post, I decided to follow suit. There’s nothing like reflecting back on your year with thoughtful questions.
What did you do in 2018 that you’d never done before?
Visited Peru. Did an overnight hike and slept in a hut under the stars at the foot of the Andes. Bought a home! Spent 3 weeks in Spain with David.
Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I honestly don’t even remember what they were - surely something along the lines of losing weight, earning more money, and traveling more. Did I meet them? Yes and no, I suppose. I didn’t keep track, as usual. That’s why I’m opting out for next year. There are an abundance of things I’d be incredibly happy if I did - I could set goals up to my eyeballs. But what I really want more than anything else is to get into alignment, AKA get (and stay) in The Vortex, AKA feel good. (This also comes from Gala Darling, as well as Abraham Hicks.) My only intention for 2019 is to be aligned. (Ok, I do have a few goals (because of who I am as a person): volunteer my time more, especially at Junior Achievement; do more things out of pure joy - I already signed up for French lessons, and I’m also going to spend more time learning how to hoop; and deepen my roots where I am. Travel would be a major bonus.
Did anyone close to you give birth?
Did anyone close to you die?
When we were in Spain (I believe it was September 12th), I got a message on LinkedIn from my biological father’s sister. She asked me to call her and, since I really never talked to her, I knew something was wrong. She told me that my biological father died of a drug-related pulmonary embolism when his 2-year-old son jumped on his chest a day earlier. It was shocking; the only person I’ve ever lost is my Grandma Catherine, who had emphysema and was very sick (and elderly) when she passed. That was in 2007. I didn’t have a relationship with him and haven’t for many years because of his abuse - drug and otherwise. I won’t go too much into that because I intend to write about it more in depth at another time. Suffice to say that I feel free.
What countries did you visit?
Peru. Spain. In the US, I visited San Francisco twice (once including Napa Valley), LA, Virginia Beach, and New York. I’m excited for next year’s travel, too. I go to San Francisco in January for work, then tagging along on David’s work trips to Seattle and Denver, and I’m planning a solo trip for my birthday. Perhaps Sri Lanka? France?
What would you like to have in 2019 that you lacked in 2018?
Confidence and trust in myself.
Did you suffer illness or injury?
I’ve been relatively healthy - a couple sore throats but nothing serious. I’ve been taking good care of myself overall.
What was the best thing you bought?
MY PINK VELVET COUCH. Hands down!
What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Giving up my freelance business to go full-time at an agency based in San Francisco. I took a role as their brand publicist and it has been thrilling to experience the growth and challenges I have so far at this job.
What song will always remind you of 2018?
Everything on my Top Songs 2018 playlist.
Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. Happier or sadder?
WAY happier! Praise beeeeee. ←— This was Gala Darling’s answer but I’m leaving it because YES.
ii. Thinner or fatter?
iii. Richer or poorer?
Interestingly, slightly poorer - I made a bit more money freelancing than I do at this job. But I’m spending more on what really matters to me and my abundance mindset is so much stronger.
What do you wish you’d done more of?
I wish I had been more present with the people I love and I wish I’d have loved myself more thoroughly. Also, solo travel. I could have used a few weeks of recharging somewhere else on the planet.
What do you wish you’d done less of?
Less comparing myself to others - it’s one of my biggest struggles.
How will you be spending New Year’s Eve?
I considered getting super dressed up and going out but ultimately settled on staying in with a bottle (or two) of bubbly, some candles, and each other. It feels fitting.
What was the most embarrassing thing that happened to you in 2018?
Aside from blanking out during a phone meeting with a new client (and being absolutely mortified) and crying on a video call with my boss (only slightly less mortifying), the most embarrassing thing that happened to me was identifying patterns and behaviors in myself that were really hard to look at.
Did you fall in love in 2018?
Over and over again
How many one-night stands?
What was your favorite TV program?
None that particularly stand out. I really enjoyed watching a bunch of Woody Allen films, as well as movies with Natalie Portman.
Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I don’t hate anyone. That said, there are some people whose true colors I finally see and I’m being infinitely more discretionary with the energy I lend them.
What was the best book you read?
The Immortalists by Chloe Benjamin and They Both Die at the End by Adam Silvera
What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 29 and I attended a surprise party (that someone gave away haha) that David threw me, and we went to Six Flags which was great fun!
How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2018?
My personal style has evolved so much; I really came into myself and started trying new (to me) styles that went beyond what I was comfortable with. The best part is that I finally understand that I’ll never have just one “style” (and thus will never have a capsule wardrobe). I’m a Gemini - I need a variety of outfits to fit my mood. I can go from silk pajamas and long kimono to Vans and a snapback to dazzling cocktail dress in the matter of a day. Having a lot of options allows me to present my inner world through my clothing and that feels so good.
What kept you sane?
Meditation. It truly did change my life. I started with Kundalini which I loved for a long time but then switched to gentler guided and silent meditations. I still do some of the breathwork that I learned in Kundalini, too.
What political issue stirred you the most?
Definitely the government holding immigrant children at the borders and separating them from their families - it makes me sick to think about. I also think it’s really important to limit your news consumption. The human nervous system is only designed to absorb the stress of its community - not the entire globe. As Gala said, you’ll burn out your adrenals. Be aware, be engaged, but also remember that you being able to find peace matters, too.
Who was the best new person you met?
To be honest, I didn’t mean many new people this year. I really stuck to my existing friends but only because this year asked me to do a lot of introspection. Using so much of my energy for healing meant that I didn’t have a ton leftover to give other people. I’m looking forward to calling in the tribe that’s meant for me in 2019.
Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2018:
If you go around giving away your power, you won’t have any left. It’s your power - you don’t have to give it away. I had to learn this on so so so many levels this year through some exhausting situations but I’m grateful because now I have taken most of my power back and I no longer feel beholden to what others think of me. Taking your power back is freeing.
Feel free to copy/paste this survey and fill it out on your site! I’d love to read about your year!